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it’s the end of the world as we know it

09/04/2011


I don’t know about the rest of the country, but here in San Diego CA there’s been a rapid increase in religious billboards, predicting that May 21 is the day of the Rapture. For those of who you don’t know what that is, it’s the day that so-called “true Christians” will be lifted up to Heaven, while the rest of us down here are left to suffer Armageddon.

No, not the Bruce Willis/Ben Affleck nightmare … we’ve already suffered through that.

So it only seemed appropriate that, as one of those individuals who probably wouldn’t be Raptured (it’s a pretty exclusive club that probably wouldn’t allow a wino liberal who DOESN’T believe President Obama is the Antichrist), I should just sit back, relax and cheers the End of Days with a bottle of wine.

Lo and behold, the perfect wine to toast the end of time.

2007 Genesis Meritage from Columbia Valley ($7.99, Trader Joe’s) is a deep ruby-colored red blend made from Merlot, Cabernet Sauvignon, Malbec and Cabernet Franc grapes. The name itself screams Biblical awesomeness – Genesis was always my favorite chapter in the Bible. I would read it as a kid, for some reason hoping that one day Eve would finally say no to the serpent and we could all live in the Garden of Eden forever.

But then again … if she had said no, we wouldn’t have booze or sex, would we? Just lots of meadow frolicking.  Never mind!

In addition, it clocks in at 14.4% alcohol, so Genesis Meritage definitely delivers a punch after just one glass.  It’s the type of wine that screams “Yes, we’re going down … but we might as well get drunk while doing it.”

The nose carries strong whiffs of oaky smoke, a bit of balsamic and red cherry. The mouth starts out a little on the tart side, but finishes with an oaky smoothness that tastes like barbequed pineapple, red cherries and truffles. It’s not admittedly the best wine, but I’ve had this baby open for 3 days and it hasn’t given up on me yet.

But please note: this is not a wine to impress. I would not bring this to your boss’ dinner party – it’s good, but not that good. Instead, I would recommend this for a night at home with a few friends, perhaps while toasting some burgers or portobello mushrooms over that lake of fire and brimstone that just erupted in your backyard.

So if you’re looking for a bottle to chug during Armageddon, look no further than Genesis Meritage. It’s cheap, tasty and effective.

“It’s the end of the world as we know it … and I’m drinking wine!”

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. 10/04/2011 00:00

    Awesome!
    As a heathen harlot, we’ll be in good company.
    I like Revelations best — it’s the Jerry Bruckheimer action movie of the Bible.

  2. 18/05/2011 17:28

    Ha, I just heard about this the other day…too funny! I remember from my sunday school daze when I was just a wee-lad, I was told that “no man, would know the day or the hour” but what do I know, I guess I’ll be left behind with all the tasty vino from those unattended cellars…Mu-ha-ha!

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